- Special Sections
- Public Notices
“Sarah Palin is a bimbo.”
Bubba Joe, my old high school buddy back in Tennesssee, blurted that out this past weekend when I rang him up to see who he was voting for.
Me being a nosy reporter, I wanted to know just why Bubba Joe placed the Alaska governor and Republican vice-presidential contender in such a low intelligence-quotient bracket, as if the media hadn’t already done a bang-up job of that.
“Because,” he said firmly. “She acts like a bimbo. She says bimbo things. She walks like a bimbo; she talks like one. I’ve seen the bimbo.”
“What did the bimbo do?” I pressed with unrelenting media assertiveness.
“She doesn’t know anything,” he said, adding sarcastically with a Tennessee twang instead of a potential Tina Fey-perfected imitation, “ ‘I can see Russia from my living room window!’ ”
“Well,” I replied. “Obviously the woman has a knack for setting up domesticity in astute proximity to the ol’ tundra. That takes some smarts. Can you see Russia from your living room window?”
No, Bubba admitted, but he can walk across the dang “crick” anytime he chooses, to get to the moonshine still and outhouse, too.
What about Joseph Biden? I wondered. “He plagiarized. Starting in law school. That’s not too swift, either.”
“Mmm-hmm,” Bubba replied in a condescending tone that told me he wasn’t listening.
The media said it’s been 20 dang years since the Democratic vice-presidential contender had to drop out of the presidential race for yet another little speech infraction referred to as plagiarism, which apparently has been long enough for Bubba to sweep it under his braided rug.
“Sarah Palin shoots wolves and mooses,” another colleague complained recently.
Bubba said he planned to tune in to “Saturday Night Live” this past weekend to see the bimbo in action for himself. Yes, he gets TV in them parts. He has a satellite dish set up in the barnyard to catch signals from networks beyond the New-nited States. Even Russia.
I didn’t get a chance to find out what he thought of her performance, but the media is saying while she might’ve indicated she has a sense of humor and is a good sport and all, she still hasn’t “faced off" with them and their scrutiny yet.
But it seems to me like she already has.
Laura Lewis is a staff writer at the Beacon. Reach her at 754-6890 or e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org.